Photo by euart

Soyen Shaku was the Buddhist monk who brought Zen to America, and the rules that he lived by can bring a little Zen into the life of a housewife too.

1. Upon awakening, quit your bed at once, like discarding a useless pair of shoes.
Getting up first in the morning, before your husband and children, gives you a head start so that you’re centred and ready for them when they start asking where their socks are.

2. In the morning, before dressing, light incense and meditate.
If you’re up before everyone else, you’ll have some time just for yourself. Meditate if that’s your thing, or pray, or just relax with a cup of tea while you contemplate your day.

3. Eat at regular intervals and only to the point of satisfying hunger.
Little pickers wear big knickers! If you’re a housewife you have constant access to the fridge, and the temptation to pick while preparing meals. Don’t! And don’t touch the leftover food on your children’s plates either. If you can’t bear to throw it away, get a Bokashi kitchen composter that even composts meat and other cooked food.

4. Retire at a regular hour.
There’s not an awful lot that needs to be said about this one. We work long hours, we need our rest. And then there’s rule number one to consider.

5. Receive a guest as when you are alone. Be alone as if you had received a guest.
This is absolutely essential for the housewife who doesn’t want to get caught in her dressing gown at midday with the house in a shambles. If you always keep your home the way that you’d prepare it for company, and welcome company when your home the way it always is you can’t go wrong. Loving that Zen paradox!

6. Be aware of what you say. Say only what you would do.
Be careful of what you say to your children, they’ll tell the person that you said it about. And if you’re not planning to actually hang them from the washing line by their thumbs or knock them into the middle of next week, don’t tell them that you are. It’s a sure fire way of losing their respect.

7. Do not forego opportunity, nevertheless, think twice.
Two-for-one offers at the supermarkets are not always a good deal. If you can freeze it, you’re okay, but if it’s fresh spinach, for example, it’ll probably go manky in the fridge before you get to the second bag.

8. Do not regret the past but look instead to the future.
You may have given up your career to be of service to your family, but they do grow up and leave home eventually, leaving you lots of time to do whatever you like.

9. Have the fearless heart of a hero and the loving heart of a child.
Mothers get good at this, being hard as nails on the one hand, and compassionate and kind on the other. We have to direct and discipline our children, while all the time demonstrating our love for them.

10. When you retire to sleep do so as if it is your last night.
Don’t go to sleep on a disagreement with your spouse or your children. Make up before bedtime. We all deserve a good night’s sleep.

Gassho!